Dad

When I landed on my first-ever teaching job in a private school, I had one great obsession in mind: to be able to share my acquired knowledge after fifteen years of intense studies since my kindergarten. You see, I was some sort of proud of myself because I had always been with honors from grade school. I consider my high school my golden years of achievements. I was be-medalled. So when I got my first assignment of handling chemistry subject to six classes of third year high school, my adrenalin pumped to the hilt. I enjoyed my first year.

The cream section captured my awe as probably they got infected with the virus I carried – the virus to achieve and become the best that they could be. Later, I found myself no longer just their chemistry teacher. Especially when we would share light moments during break time and after dismissal time in the afternoon. I became a friend to most of them.

In one of the conventions that I had attended to chaperon our school’s student delegates, I never knew I would discover more about one of my students whom I sat beside with while we were in the gym watching the ceremonies of a religious gathering. In between watching and paying attention to the speaker of invited guest priests, bishops, and movie personalities, we took chances of whispering our conversations to each other. I learned she never saw her father again since that time that her parents decided to part ways. It only occurred to her then, now that she was a teenager, what it meant to lose a dad who should have been with her in her growing up years. She had this grandfather whom she fondly called Tatay who stood in her dad’s stead. Since then, we both became close to one another.

I could not recall anymore how it started. I just knew, in one of her letters to me, she addressed me DAD. Oh, how I cherished those moments. My being a teacher to her added a different touch. I would write her notes which I signed back as dad. On her high school graduation, she was so proud as she was one among the honor students telling her Tatay that I became one of those who touched her life most. Her mommy knew how close we were.

Unfortunately, on the next five years of my teaching career, I was appointed to become the discipline head of our department. I accepted it with great conviction that I could probably make a difference for the boys. But it triggered students to become aloof with me. Many distanced themselves. They saw me as someone stern and stoic. Someone they avoided. In those years, my heart bled as I never wanted to be abhorred by students. I wanted to be someone they could run to, I wanted to be a friend as I wished they could be, too, to me.

Meanwhile, for her next two years as a college student at the Ateneo, she still continued to write notes to me with the same affectionate dad in her greeting. In one of her letters, she asked me to keep it and show it back to her 10 years after. I did. We chanced upon each other again- and again inside a gym while my ex-girlfriend and I attended a musical competition. Fortunately I brought with me her two letters she wrote 11 years back. I showed them back to her and it rekindled our once beautiful past. Oh how we laughed and giggled. She hasn’t changed a bit even as she is now just waiting for her bar exams result to come out. [Now she is a full-fledged lawyer based in New York.]

But there is more to her two letters than what she knew. Eight years after she wrote them, I showed them to Rona, one of the students who became close to me in our moments of sharing together. At that time, our friendship was already going beyond hi’s and hello’s. I felt she was awed by the closeness of the letter writer to me by calling me her DAD. She remarked "Probably you were so loving a dad to her. Buti pa siya tinawag kang dad.”, she sighed. I held her hands and said straight in her eyes, “You, too, can call me dad…”

My life changed since. Rona represented the ordinary students who came in and out of my classroom. To me, she symbolized a number of those who have so many stories to tell about themselves. Her dad, too, together with her younger sister, left her, when she was yet in the elementary.

Rona transformed me from being the business-like teacher to my students to a more caring and understanding one. She brought back those good old days of my teaching career when I was a teacher my students could run to. From my former image when I was a discipline head, gradually students began to be close to me again. Many of them felt they were lucky because they became close to me as their head in academics. Truth is, I felt the other way around. I was blessed because of them.

Today, I see my every student the face of both Tricia and Rona. I wish I had the luxury of time to go deeper into each one of them. Their smiles probably hide something painful within and like any other mortals, each of them could be waiting for someone to just simply listen to them not with the ears but with the heart or probably just a DAD to them.

Thanksgiving Message and Expression of Love to my Nanang

Thanksgiving Message and Expression of Love

Interment of Nanang
MANUELA URCIA GUILLERMO
April 13, 1944 – November 12, 2008

(Here is the full text of what I delivered during the Requiem Mass for my Nanang before a full-packed San Roque Parish in Sanchez Mira, Cagayan. I accompanied this one with multimedia presentation of the salient parts of the text.)

To stand before all of you to express our deepest and most heartfelt thanks for all your gestures of kindness, generosity, prayers, and love during our most difficult time of bereavement because of the demise of our dearly loved Nanang is one of the most heart-rending and heart-breaking moments.

Our hearts are full, filled with thanksgiving no amount of words can contain. We were so touched that during the hours of our bereavement, you were there by our side helping all of us to carry through. Your prayers, your presence, your expressions of condolences, your sharing of selves, your sacrifices, your kind words of encouragement – all of these helped our family – the Guillermo family – to face with strength the loss of a dear mother.

Together with Tatang, she raised five children molding each one of us painstakingly into the persons she dreamt us to be. Together with Tatang, she built a family she was always proud of. All of us – the five children – have experienced the unconditional love of our Nanang. Four boys and a girl. All of us professionals, which every parent dreams for her children. Dante is now an entrepreneur of his own. Arnel manages also a little shop. Epie Rey works in a bank in its I.T. department. Mae teaches I.T. and at the same time Clubs and Organizations Chairperson at St. Paul College of Island Park, while I am the High School Academic Chair at St. Paul College of Bocaue.

Nanang is survived by her only sibling, Auntie Minda and her family, and the happy family that they both built with Tatang with 11 grandchildren, and only yesterday another one was born making it 12. Nanang loved all of them so much. More so for her four in-laws.

1. Dante and Nelia have

• Delainne Rose – 17 years old, 2nd year BS Education major in English student of Cagayan State University here in Sanchez Mira
• Dianne Rose – 15 years old, a fourth year student at the Divine Word High School here in Sanchez Mira
• Dann Darrell Ralph - 12 years old, first year student also at the Divine Word High School
• Dan Dave Rodneil – 10 years old, Grade V at Sanchez Mira Central Elementary School

2. Arnel and Maricar have

• Adrian Paul – 7 years old, Grade I at the Sanchez Mira Central Elementary School
• Marianne Joy – 1 year old – the last one Nanang was very fond of

3. Epie Rey and Josie have

• Jazelle Chloe – 3 years old, whom Nanang had the privilege of taking care of her last summer
• Manuel Jeoffrey – 1 day old, the latest whom Nanang was not able to see anymore.

4. Sue and I have

• Kevin Paul – 17 years old, 2nd Year BS Geology student at the University of the Philippines – Diliman
• Kamille Marie – 12 years old, First Year high school student at St. Paul College of Bocaue
• Karen Jobelle – 8 years old, Grade III at St. Paul College of Bocaue
• Kathleen Joy – 5 years old, Kinder in Amulung, whom Nanang took care while she was yet a toddler

5. Mae – the only girl and only one among the five children who is still single.

Through the years, in between bouts of hypertension and diabetes mellitus, Nanang always found time to visit us, her children and grandchildren. She loved to travel as she enjoyed the sights of different places while travelling with Tatang.

Nanang retired from the Cagayan State University – Sanchez Mira Campus after having prodded her to have an early retirement at age 58, due to deteriorating health, just few years after Tatang also retired from service. She was then the Chair of the College of Agriculture.

I figured out it must have been providential because both of them were eventually so absorbed in the Couples for Christ. Tatang and Nanang would travel together to different places actively helping in the formation of several communities of the Couples for Christ. She did not consider her health condition as a major hindrance in serving the Lord. Tatang and Nanang, I learned, would often deliver talks in the Christian Life Program of the CFC. They would join the other couples in this part of the province in the different CFC Programs. I am elated more knowing that Tatang and Nanang were both happily serving in this Parish, with Tatang as an Extraordinary Lay Minister of the Holy Communion. To my mind, I was telling myself, what a beautiful way of spending the rest of their lives together – giving their last ounce of strength in the service of the Lord.

During the wake of Nanang, I have witnessed throngs and throngs of people from the different chapters of Couples for Christ – Sta. Praxedes, Claveria, Sanchez Mira, Pamplona, Abulug, Aparri, Camalaniugan, and still others where Nanang and Tatang were both involved. I did not know that they both were among those who the CFC considered as seed couples. Now I know that Nanang and Tatang truly are silent workers in the vineyard of the Lord. Nanang’s dedication was extraordinarily admirable. Despite being an amputee on her left leg, and even after she was partially paralyzed, Nanang never wavered in her involvement in the Couples for Christ! She was stronger than ever. Up to the very end, she used her last dose of strength working in the Lord’s vineyard.

Two days after her remarkable display of enthusiasm and commitment to her work in the Couples for Christ, she simply told Tatang, she felt so weak. She lovingly told Tatang she felt her time has come. With all love and compassion, Tatang assured her that she just needed to be strong and that God have infinite mercy. But her physical body was deteriorating fast. We learned later on that her immediate cause of death was enlargement of the heart brought about by acute myocardial infarction, indirectly caused by her diabetic condition. Her lungs were filled with fluids. Her kidneys eventually collapsed. All she asked for was for her to be helped seated or to lie down. Tatang and Arnel took turns to pump more oxygen as she was gasping for breath. But she did not complain. She must have been struggling from pain, but silently. She passed away just few minutes after an automatic respirator was attached to her. Then the monitor went flat. Nanang is gone.

To me, there was nothing more devastating to know than receiving a text informing me that Nanang is gone. At 10:29:05 p.m. of November 12, I received that text message I feared most when Nanang was rushed to the hospital that other night. My brother Arnel texted me, "Awan nanangen."

"Mother is gone."

Words I received while I was about to retire for the night. It didn't sink right away. I texted back my brother. "Ania??!! Natayen??" "What??!! She already passed away??"

Then I called up my other brother, Dante. He was sobbing in between our conversations. I couldn't hold back my emotions anymore. I told him, our mother had sacrificed so much for all of us. She had suffered for so long. She endured all because we cannot provide all her medical needs and interventions so that her agony from diabetes and hypertensive episodes would be controlled, at least.

Then it dawned on us, we are so poor. We don't have money to start with. My brother at the other line told me he only had P400.00 left in his pocket. I barely had P2,000.00 left in my pocket.

"Can you remedy something tonight from anyone whom you think can help us?" I asked him.

"Perhaps they are already all asleep," he sobbed. "I was selling my motorcycle but no one could take it immediately," he added in between his cries.

I wept. We are so helpless. We got no one whom we can immediately run to. We don't even have even just a handful of relatives in Sanchez Mira. Our parents simply migrated there since we were small. Our relatives are all scattered in Lal-lo and in Camalaniugan. No one really to run to.

I called up my brother Rey. He was also crying. I tried calling up our only sister, Mae. She could not be reached. I was figuring out how we could bring home Nanang from the Cagayan Valley Medical Center (CVMC) in Tuguegarao without some good money to start with. I wept some more in pity.

Then I remembered Tatang. How’s my beloved Tatang. I couldn’t talk to him via cellphone. The cellphone of Nanang was defective. I wept with the thought that I was not there when he needed me most. I wept some more thinking that only our brother Arnel was beside him. It must have been so painful for him to lose the love of your life. Through thick and thin, Tatang took care of her unconditionally. Tatang became her personal nurse, so to speak. Our Tatang is a very strong-willed person. He is the source of strength and inspiration of the entire family. I have not seen greater love than his for our Nanang. All my entire life, I have not seen a single time that they ever had any fight at all. Our Tatang is truly a great example of a husband and a father. To me, no one comes close to the love that I have seen in both of them. That is why, for all of us, their children, we could not afford to fail them and cause them pain in our married life. Tatang and Nanang are our best model of happily married couple despite their struggles in life.

Now, our mother is gone. Our mother already left us. She had left us, with all her five children, professionals. But no matter how much we may have given back to her, materially, monetarily, and presence, nothing would be enough to match the love and the sacrifices she had given to all of us. She was always very happy each time that we would visit them in Sanchez Mira. On special occasions, she would look forward to seeing all of us. But many times, we failed to complete our family.

Now, we paid her our last respects. We finally had a family reunion like no other. But we saw our mother already in her coffin. It was a sight that broke our hearts. No amount of comforting words would suffice for the loss of a mother so dearly loved.

Nanang, wherever you are right now, please know that we love you so much. Please know that I love you so much. You know that very much. While we grieve for your demise, we are comforted that you are freed from your physical sufferings that you had long endured. We are comforted that you are now with our Lord, with God in His promised eternal life. With all compassion and love, we know that the Lord accepted you with a heartfelt embrace. Let alone your dedication in the Lord's vineyard be one of your redemptions.

Thank you for the years that we had you with us. Thank you for the unconditional love you had given to each one of us, your 5 children, our children, and most of all to Tatang. Thank you for the unforgettable lessons that you had taught us. Thank you so much for everything.

For the many times that we have failed you, forgive us.

For the many heartaches that we have given you, look at us with compassion.

For the many moments that we ignored your pleas of help, understand us.

For the many promises that we have broken, embrace us.

For the many times that we left you alone, be with us.

Nanang, go in peace to the Lord and bring with you our love and a wonderful memory of a family you have built with Tatang. Bring all our cares and burdens to the foot of Jesus. Offer all your sacrifices for us whom you have left behind. Please beg Jesus to pour out His blessings on us, your family, which up to now is still wallowing in dire poverty. Please ask our most loving and eternal God to send us what we needed to live decent lives.

Nanang, it is not goodbye. It is not farewell. Jesus Himself taught us that a seed has to die in order to live. Now, you live in our hearts. Now we carry you wherever we are. Now we have you always with us.

Nanang, I love you so much...

Tatang, I know it must be so painful to lose Nanang. We all do feel the same pain. But I want you to know that we are all here for you. We will all miss Nanang by our side. You have sacrificed so much for her. Nanang couldn’t ask for more. It is our consolation that we have a Tatang like you. A Tatang who’s all loving and all sacrificing. We are so proud of you. You are our model of a father. To us, no one comes close to you. Tatang, rest assured of our love more than ever.

To all our relatives who have come from afar, your presence is a testimony of how much we are loved. We can never thank you enough for all your offers of sacrifices. With you around, we were able to carry through this difficult time in our family with less burdens on our shoulders.

To all of you who have come and shared in our grief, thank you so much. I am sure, Nanang was happily attending to each one of you as you offered your prayers, time, talent, and treasures for her. May God who is never outdone in generosity reward you with the choices gifts that each one of you deserves.

To our Parish Priest, Rev. Fr. Roberto Ibay, SVD, thank you so much for this special Requiem Mass.

To God, the infinite source of mercy and love, thank you for our Nanang’s 64 years in this world. Thank you for having her as our Nanang. Thank you for all the blessings and graces that You have showered on her. Grant her eternal rest O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon her. May Nanang rest in peace.

I remember an old lullaby that I used to hear. May I sing it again for Nanang.

Oh my Mama
To me she was so wonderful
Oh my Mama
To me she was so good

Gone are the days
When she would take me on her knees
And with a smile
She’d change my tears to laughters

Oh my Mama
So funny yet adorable
Oh my Mama
To me she was so good.

My Mother is Gone...

Tonight at 10:29:05 p.m., I received a text message I feared most when Nanang was rushed to the hospital the other night. My brother Arnel texted me, "Awan nanangen."

"Mother is gone."

Words I received while I was about to retire for the night. It didn't sink right away. I texted back my brother. "Ania??!! Natayen??" "What??!! She already passed away??"

Then I called up my other brother, Dante. He was sobbing in between our conversations. I couldn't hold back my emotions anymore. I told him, our mother had sacrificed so much for all of us. She had suffered for so long. She endured all because we cannot provide all her medical needs and interventions so that her agony from diabetes and hypertensive episodes would be controlled, at least.

Then it dawned on us, we are so poor. We don't have money to start with. My brother at the other line told me he only had P400.00 left in his pocket. I barely have P2,000.00 left in my pocket.

"Can you remedy something tonight from anyone whom you think can help us?" I asked him.

"Perhaps they are already all asleep," he sobbed. "I was selling my motorcycle but no one could take it immediately," he added in between his cries.

I wept. We are so helpless. We got no one whom we can immediately run to. We don't even have relatives in Sanchez Mira. Our parents simply migrated there since we were small. Our relatives are all scattered in Lal-lo and in Camalaniugan. No one really to run to.

I called up my brother Rey. He was also crying. I tried calling up our only sister, Mae. She could not be reached. I was figuring out how we could bring home Nanang from the Cagayan Valley Medical Center (CVMC) in Tuguegarao without some good money to start with. I wept some more in pity.

My mother had suffered so much from her illness of diabetes mellitus. It reached that point that we had to recommend the amputation of her left leg because of a non-healing wound that already reached her thigh. We knew it must have been very difficult for her to let go of one of her legs. But she sacrificed it just so she could no longer feel the unending and agonizing pain of a decaying left leg. Since then, she was on wheel chair. Immediately after her leg amputation, we ordered for a leg prosthetics so that she could still walk in balance after her recuperation. Thanks God, she was able to walk with it after months and months of hard work and practice.

But she did not only suffer from diabetes. Prior to it, she was hypertensive. She would suffer from intermittent episodes of chest pains and all kinds of aches that could be attributed to high blood pressure. She suffered from it since my high school days. This progressed to acute hypertensive conditions. Many times, she would be rushed to the hospital because of unstable and high blood pressure. It was because of these two conditions that we asked her to take an early retirement from her university work as a Department Chairman for Agriculture at the Cagayan State University - Sanchez Mira. It was because of declining health conditions.

There had been moments when my mother's BP would shoot up uncontrollably and extremely high. I remember one incident when one of her toes on her right foot was about to be amputated also because of gangrene. While at the operating room, she suffered from stroke. Instead of proceeding to her amputation, she was rushed to the Intensive Care Unit of the hospital - St. Paul Hospital in Tuguegarao. We thought she would be more disabled after the stroke. But she fought hard for her life and limb. She recovered from the stroke. After several days of staying in the hospital to be stabilized in her condition, her middle finger on her right foot was finally amputated.

The most devastating toll of her strokes, which was milder that we thought, was the latest. Half of her body was paralyzed. The half where the complete right foot was. She hardly could move her fingers, more so lift up her arm. She described it as there were a thousand needles pricking on her. She was so helpless. She could not move her body on her own. But she fought hard so that she could be normal again.

She had months of physical therapy with my father. She would be massaged from time to time by Tatang. She would be given some electrical treatments. She clung to her faith and will that soon she would recover from her paralysis. Which she did, before her own mother, Lola Edding died. She was able to walk again and move her arms again after taking some therapeutic concoctions of the fabled Goji juice that my father gave her. Since then, she was taking Goji juice.

All we thought, things would already be alright for her. Bubbly once more, until Lola Edding died. Perhaps she became so low on the death of Lola Edding.

All along, our father whom we fondly call Tatang, is always beside her. Through thick and thin, our father took care of her unconditionally. Tatang became her personal nurse, so to speak. Our Tatang is a very strong-willed person. He is the source of strength and inspiration of the entire family. I have not seen greater love than his for our mother. All my entire life, I have not seen a single time that they ever had any fight at all. Our Tatang is truly a great example of a husband and a father. To me, no one comes close to the love that I have seen in both of them.

I had long wanted to go home and be at her service even just for a while. But I couldn't because of work. My family is down here in Bulacan. My work is one that an absence means so much.

Now, our mother is gone. My mother already left us. She had left us, with all her five children, professionals. But no matter how much we may have given back to her, materially, monetarily, and presence, nothing would be enough to match the love and the sacrifices she had given to all of us. She was always very happy each time that we would visit them in Sanchez Mira. On special occasions, she would look forward to seeing all of us. But many times, we failed to complete our family.

Now, we would all go to pay her our last respects. We would finally have a family reunion like no other. We would bring our families, too. But we would see our mother already in her coffin. It would be a sight that would break our hearts. No amount of comforting words would suffice for the loss of a mother so dearly loved.

Nanang, wherever you are right now, please know that we love you so much. Please know that I love you so much. You know that very much. While we grieve for your demise, we are comforted that you are freed from your physical sufferings that you had long endured. We are comforted that you are now with our Lord, with God in His promised eternal life. With all compassion and love, we know that the Lord accepted you with a heartfelt embrace. Let alone your dedication in the Lord's vineyard be one of your redemptions.

Thank you for the years that we had you with us. Thank you for the unconditional love you had given to each one of us, your 5 children, our children, and most of all to Tatang. Thank you for the unforgettable lessons that you had taught us. Thank you so much for everything.

For the many times that we have failed you, forgive us.

For the many heartaches that we have given you, look at us with compassion.

For the many moments that we ignored your pleas of help, understand us.

For the many promises that we have broken, embrace us.

For the many times that we left you alone, be with us.

Nanang, bring with you our love and a wonderful memory of a family you have built with Tatang. Bring all our cares and burdens to the foot of Jesus. Offer all your sacrifices for us whom you have left behind. Please beg Jesus to pour out His blessings on us, your family, which up to now is still wallowing in dire poverty. Please ask our Lord to send us what we needed to live decent lives.

Nanang, it is not goodbye. It is not farewell. Jesus Himself taught us that a seed has to die in order to live. Now, you live in our hearts. Now we carry you wherever we are. Now we have you always with us.

Nanang, I love you so much...

Street Dancing

Today I escorted in motorcycle the Street Dancing in celebration of the declaration of the St. Martin of Tours Parish here in our rustic town as a Diocesan Shrine for the Mahal na Poon ng Krus sa Wawa. I was telling myself it could be a great material for my blog today.

The declaration of our Parish church as a Diocesan Shrine is long overdue. But it only materialized during the incumbency of our current parish priest, Fr. Jovi. The Mahal na Poon ng Krus sa Wawa has long been a legend in this place. The cross is wooden black allegedly found by a fisherman floating at the delta of the Wawa River several hundred years ago. He got the black cross. The residents would procession it in the Wawa River every anniversary of its discovery. Then there were stories of miracles attributed to it. Floods and droughts did not make a heavy toll on the residents each time that a 9-day ligiran would be dedicated to the black cross. The cross would be brought back once more to the Wawa River in flamboyant fluvial procession. The well decorated, motorized boat that carries the cross eventually was called Pagoda. there had been years that the Pagoda was three-tiered. At times it was either higher or lower than that.

From then on, there was this strong devotion of people that it's feast of discovery even eclipsed the feast of the Parish patron saint, St. Martin of Tours. The feast drew people from all walks of life, even those from afar.

Tomorrow, the Parish Church would be consecrated as the Diocesan Shrine of the Mahal na Krus sa Wawa.

It is a way of elevating the consciousness of people on the Cross.

Internet surfing

Thanks to Tim Berners-Lee (Sir Timothy John Berners-Lee), the inventor of the World Wide Web in 1989 while he was at CERN. We now enjoy rapid information exchange because of him.

His invention practically shrunk the world. Especially when it was not just textual information anymore that could be shared and accessed via the telecommunications networks. It did not take so long when graphics began to spruce up the screens of computers. Then there was sound. Then video. Now, the technology of the Internet is quantum leaps away from its crude form. It has become the frontier of information. Often referred to as the Information Superhighway, it has become virtually the biggest library ever assembled. But one has to be carefully selective on the information fished out from the Internet. There are lots of both authentic information and data and exaggerated, adulterated ones. The Internet is flooded with all types of sites. It's anything goes. Even the unimaginable could be found lurking somewhere in the World Wide Web.

There are sites for organizations, for governments, for legitimate businesses, foundations, financial institutions, universities and colleges, entertainment, newspapers and magazines, books, software, forums, churches, etc. But side by side with all these authentic sources of information, there are also almost the same number or even more websites which could be considered plain gross, weird, offensive, discriminating, appalling, disgusting. Simply put, sites which should have no place in a world populated by decent, well-bred, well-educated people. Most of these sites, though, are expressions of personal or collective beliefs and philosophies. Some peddle people as if they are commodities like the pornographic sites. Others are meant to demean, discredit, demolish others. Others are plain criminal sites. Some are dedicated to illegitimate software sharing. Some download sites disregard the rights of the original creators on their intellectual properties.

Surf the Net and you get everything under the sun. The Web is rich. Super rich. And a lot of sites are literally filthy rich!

Perhaps the best-earning websites are those dedicated to pornography. They exist because of the huge dark market worldwide. There are millions out there lurking incognito accessing them, even just for some samplers. But for those who have strong carnal and lustful desires, they would not mind punching their international credit cards just to access the promised filthier, dirtier, more instinctively animalistic contents! And you can already imagine the heavens as these sites practically crunch millions and millions of dollars into their online bank accounts. Imagine a site that could lure even just a million peeping toms an entire year. Let's say each member threw in even just $10 for a year. That's a whopping $10 million! And the site simply maintains graphics and videos that satisfy the hot-blooded dark market. These sites peddle mostly young girls, either voluntarily, forced, or perhaps paid meagerly.

This is where parents should guide their children on their surfing habits. Even the social networks like Friendster.com now are infiltrated by unscrupulous individuals posting porn stuffs. Video sites like YouTube.com are not spared. There is no way that these sites can truly verify the ages posted by children when they begin signing up in these seemingly safe sites. Even a 7-year old can practically sign up and fool the site that the child is already 50 years old. With such vulnerability, YouTube's adult contents could be accessed even by children who are too young to understand what could be going on on screen.

When Tim Berners-Lee invented the World Wide Web, perhaps pornography and other filthy contents that could be shared to others through this technology were way far from his mind and intentions. But like any other technology that is invented for the boon of mankind, there is always the bane for it. Take the cellphone, for instance. The tiny digital gadget intended for communications, entertainment, and productivity could also be the same gadget that could destroy or even kill time-treasured virtues and values that the humankind could hold on to to make this world a better place to live in.

Surfing the Internet is fun. But the fun could be dangerously deceiving.

'Change has come to America'

Click on the image above to watch Obama's Victory Speech in Chicago. The full text is shown below.

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled – Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It's the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.

I just received a very gracious call from Senator McCain. He fought long and hard in this campaign, and he's fought even longer and harder for the country he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him and Governor Palin for all they have achieved, and I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on that train home to Delaware, the Vice President-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last sixteen years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation's next First Lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both so much, and you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the White House. And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother is watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight, and know that my debt to them is beyond measure.

To my campaign manager David Plouffe, my chief strategist David Axelrod, and the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics – you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to – it belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington – it began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston.

It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give five dollars and ten dollars and twenty dollars to this cause. It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy; who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep; from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on the doors of perfect strangers; from the millions of Americans who volunteered, and organized, and proved that more than two centuries later, a government of the people, by the people and for the people has not perished from this Earth. This is your victory.

I know you didn't do this just to win an election and I know you didn't do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime – two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor's bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America – I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you – we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can't solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it's been done in America for two-hundred and twenty-one years – block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began twenty-one months ago in the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek – it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you.

So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers – in this country, we rise or fall as one nation; as one people.

Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House – a party founded on the values of self-reliance, individual liberty, and national unity. Those are values we all share, and while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, "We are not enemies, but friends…though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection." And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn – I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your President too.

And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world – our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those who would tear this world down – we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security – we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright – tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope.

For that is the true genius of America – that America can change. Our union can be perfected. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.

This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight is about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing – Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons – because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America – the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs and a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.

When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that "We Shall Overcome." Yes we can.

A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can.

America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves – if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time – to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth – that out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people:

Yes We Can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.

Obama wins!

I knew it. I was right in my fearless forecast. Sen. Barack Obama II is the next US President. Of Kenyan blood. Of African lineage.

BBC News declared it boldly.

Obama wins historic US elections.
Democratic Senator Barack Obama is elected the first black president of the United States.

His rival John McCain accepted defeat, saying "I deeply admire and commend" Mr Obama. He called on his supporters to lend the next president their goodwill.

Mr Obama captured the key battleground states of Pennsylvania and Ohio, before passing the essential figure of 270 electoral college votes at 0400 GMT, when projections showed he had also taken California and a slew of other states.

There's much to learn in this US Elections. A new school of political perspective has taken roots. There's so much vigor and strength in Obama. He represented new ways of looking at things. New blood. New direction. New international policies. Change.

Obama was a symbolic candidate. He was every man's story. From a broken family, he was raised by a single mom. He studied hard all his way up to the best universities in the U.S. As an adult, Obama admitted that during high school he used marijuana, cocaine, and alcohol, which he described at the 2008 Civil Forum on the Presidency as his greatest moral failure. Barack is described by his campaign website so vividly as

Barack Obama was raised by a single mother and his grandparents. They didn't have much money, but they taught him values from the Kansas heartland where they grew up. He took out loans to put himself through school. After college, he worked for Christian churches in Chicago, helping communities devastated when steel plants closed. Obama turned down lucrative job offers after law school to return to Chicago, leading a successful voter registration drive. He joined a small law firm, taught constitutional law and, guided by his Christian faith, stayed active in his community. Obama and his wife Michelle are proud parents of two daughters, Sasha, 10 and Malia, 7.

I don't know how his victory would impact on the Filipino nation. But I feel that he will have new ways of strengthening our diplomatic relationship with the U.S. He will have better treatment and preference to migrant workers in the U.S., picking from his own family's experience when his father, a Kenyan, also went to the U.S. not so much to find him a living but to study.

I guess Obama would have a big heart for the Filipino workers and the Filipino communities not just in US territories but elsewhere around the world. It will not just be for the Filipinos. Any other race would be given much attention. His family was once like them.

At his age, just 6 years earlier than me, he is yet at the peak of his youth. Fearless to try new ways, he might change the image of the US from being a guardian of democracy through military power to something yet unprecedented. Or will his still aggressive youth be more ferocious than his predecessors?

Obama will be starting his presidency at a critical point where the US was yet suffering from the greatest financial slump experienced in this highly economically advanced world. I sometimes ask myself where have all the summa cum laudes of the best business and financial schools gone? Is it not that the US economy is monitored and run by the best financial minds the world can afford? How come it has become so vulnerable to financial meltdown that an impending recession is now being feared? Obama has to move decisively and wisely. His financial policies will definitely make ripple effects worldwide.

I wish that in his presidency, the US will no longer be so paranoid on non-US citizens. The US has crafted practically all kinds of laws and I feel that most of these are laws of restrictions trying to control, catalog, record, document movements of individuals especially non-US citizens. Need I say especially on those coming from the Middle East?

I felt I was also victorious in his winning the US Presidential Elections. Obama represented all other races worldwide. He is the pride of Kenya. He is the pride of the colored. He is the man of the underdog. He is the president of the masa.

I hope he will not fail the people. I hope that he will truly be a symbol of change.

To Obama, be our President. Congratulations!

Thanks, Badoodles!

I had been following the blog of Badoodles for quite a time now. Badoodles is the one behind the famous Kwentong Barbero. If you haven't visited yet, go to it now!

Kwentong Barbero is full of life. It is a humor blog that has lots of followers. I am one of them. Today, I happened to have been the first one to comment on his latest post in his entry The Art of Being Funny. He rewarded me by posting my blogsite in his Tambay Dito list. That's advertisement!

Thanks Badoodles! Now I am finally featured in your famous site.

Here is a composite of the entry:

Fearless forecast on US Elections 2008

No. I had not been following very closely the US Elections 2008 fever. But even with my very limited readings and listening to the stories on the campaign, I predict without second thoughts that Sen. Barack Hussein Obama II will be the next US President.

Obama's battle cry is change. Very similar to ours here in the Philippines. Even without mentioning it, his blood lineage would eventually become his passport to the White House. Obama's father, Barack Hussein Obama Sr., was a full-blooded Kenyan. Obama Sr. was married to Anne Dunham, a white American from Kansas. Sen. Obama was born in Hawaii. His parents met while attending the University of Hawaii at Manoa, where his father was a foreign student. They separated when he was two years old and later divorced. Obama's father returned to Kenya and saw his son only once more before dying in an automobile accident in 1982. In short, Sen. Obama is truly an African-American. And just in case he will be ascending to power in the White House after this elections, he will be the first African-American to lead the virtually most powerful nation on earth!

Kenya is now swept with Obama-mania. Reports had it that the Obama-mania had gone feverish. Rob Krilly of Times Online describes it this way:

The tiny Kenyan farmstead where Barack Obama's father grew up herding goats has had a makeover fit for a President.

Where once the goats roamed freely across a field of thick grass studded with mango trees, a security fence and imposing gate keep the animals in and intruders out.

Road rollers and bulldozers have been deployed this past week — days after Raila Odinga, the Prime Minister, made a surprise visit — smoothing out the rutted dirt track leading to the Obama family land.

Speaking in front of the first handful of journalists to have made the journey to the far west of Kenya, Abongo Malik Obama, Mr Obama's half-brother, summed up the excitement of a watching nation. He said that the world would benefit from an Obama in the White House, not just his relatives or tribemates.

He went on: “Here is a man who nobody would have thought could be President of the United States. His success shows that anybody with his background and origins can do it. There's no limitations.”

If Obama-mania has swept across the world, then the bustling city of Kisumu, just an hour's drive from Mr Obama's ancestral home, must be its epicentre.

Stalls in the city's sprawling market are crammed with wonky photocopied portraits offered for sale in cheap frames. Clothes shops have run out of T-shirts printed up for the American elections.

For the past four years Kenyans have been enthralled by the meteoric rise of a politician born to one of their own. His homecoming two years ago brought hundreds of thousands of people on to the streets of Kisumu. Even then no one could have believed he would come this close to the White House.

Kenya's coverage of the campaign has been extensive and the pundits all predict a landslide. Tomorrow the shops will shut as the country celebrates. “On the day we will be having a celebration,” says Kogode, a member of a political club that meets under a lilac-blossomed jacaranda tree each afternoon. “We will be slaughtering a goat, having some beer and holding an event. Of that there is no doubt.”

The local airport is being renovated, leading to jokes that it is being designed to accommodate Air Force One. An enterprising tour operator is offering Obama safaris, driving visitors up to the gates of the simple farmstead where his father grew up and where his step-grandmother still lives, and in the capital, Nairobi, a musical of Mr Obama's life story is reopening. In Kisumu, Charles Omondi's rickety wooden bench is filled with “success cards”. On the outside they carry the image of Mr Obama and the Stars and Stripes; inside they wish students “all the best in your forthcoming exams”.

“The idea is that everyone wants to be like him,” Mr Omondi said. “His example will help them pass.” It is the same story across town, where Donna Otieno sells T-shirts at the Our Joint Boutique. She bought a test batch of five and sold them in two days, prompting her to fill her rails with Obama T-shirts bearing the legend “Pride of Kenya”.

“Here is the origin of Obama,” she said. “He's our son and we are very proud.”

My Myers-Briggs Personality Assessment Result

I am sharing here a test which I took online. I was just interested on how a standardized test fares me. Here was the result:

Your personality type is Introversion, Sensing, Thinking, Judging (ISTJ)

Summary

Serious, quiet, earn success by concentration and thoroughness. Practical, orderly, matter-of-fact, logical, realistic, and dependable. See to it that everything is well-organized. Take responsibility. Make up their own minds as to what should be accomplished and work toward it steadily, regardless of protests or distractions.


Detailed Result

ISTJs direct their energy towards the inner world of ideas and information. They try to clarify concepts and information, seeking to have as clear a knowledge as possible. They often place a lot of trust in experience, but also envisage future goals providing there is a clear pathway to that goal.

What makes an ISTJ tick?

The Dominant function is the perceptive one of Sensing. Characteristics associated with this function include:

* looking at information in terms of facts and details
* Focuses more on the here and now rather than possibilities for the future
* Feels comfortable in areas of proven experience
* Takes a realistic approach


The perceptive Sensing function is introverted. That is, Sensing is used primarily to govern the inner world of thoughts and emotions. The ISTJ will therefore:

* Seek to develop a realistic understanding of the world as it is, in the light of what he/she observes
* Be pragmatic in nature, constantly learning to adapt to the world as it is now
* Observe in a subjective way, selecting and relating facts that others would not, and seeing those facts more in terms of impressions and significance than pure fact .


The Sensing function is primarily supported by extroverted Thinking judgment, That is, Thinking judgment is used primarily to manage the outer world of actions and spoken words. This will modify the way that the Sensing is directed, by:

* focusing the (inner world) Sensing on impersonal facts and logical options
* tending to spot flaws and injustices
* making decisions on the basis of logical analysis that support the ISTJ's understanding of the world.


The classic temperament of an ISTJ is Epimethean, or Melancholic, for whom a basic driving force is duty, service and the need to belong.

Contributions to the team of an ISTJ
In a team environment, the ISTJ can contribute by:

* working hard and efficiently to complete tasks by the deadlines set
* sorting ideas and identifying those that are most practical
* applying a common sense approach to problem solving
* maintaining team focus on the objective
* contributing practical organizational skills
* applying procedures and methodologies
* applying relevant and realistic logical arguments


The potential ways in which an ISTJ can irritate others include:

* focusing too much on the current task at the expense of longer term or interpersonal issues
* not articulating his/her understanding of the situation
* not seeing the wood for the trees
* being too serious
* seeming to be inflexible
* not encouraging others to experiment or innovate
* not promoting his/her own ideas or achievements


Personal Growth

As with all types, the ISTJ can achieve personal growth by developing all functions that are not fully developed, through actions such as:

* articulating more of the ISTJ's own views
* developing a long term vision, that avoids focusing on details
* developing a greater understanding of how people feel
* changing things on an experimental basis to see if they can be improved
* learning to promote the ISTJ's ideas and achievements to others, recognizing that others may well find them valuable
* making decisions on the basis of how others will feel, rather than objective considerations


Recognising Stress

As stress increases, 'learned behaviour' tends to give way to the natural style, so the ISTJ will behave more according to type when under greater stress. For example, in a crisis, the ISTJ might:

* find a place of solitude in which to think and work
* use tried and trusted means of solving problems
* direct or criticise others' efforts
* use pragmatic solutions at the expense of the long term


ISTJ Careers

The jobs/occupations that have a closer fit to those with ISTJ preferences:

Doctor/health care, Librarian, Entrepreneur/self-employed, Forces, Administrator

Cross-post

I just finished trying cross-posting this site to Multiply.com. I hope it works. But just in case, my Multiply site is http://dadgie.multiply.com/. Please visit it, too.

All Souls' Day

Today is All Souls' Day.

And I remember all those who have left this world ahead. As a young boy, I can only remember the wake of my beloved Lolo Maximino. There were so many people who came. Perhaps because during the War (WWII), he was then the Kapitan in their barangay in Catayauan, a sleepy barangay of Lal-lo in Cagayan. Lots of faces I hardly could even recognize and remember now came. And I was one of their favorite among the grandchildren. Why, because I am the eldest of their only son among the nine children of Lolo and Lola Luming. I was perhaps around 5 years old only at that time. I knew we finally laid him down to rest in a public cemetery located on a side of a hill. He was placed six feet under the soil.

To my vivid recollections, next was this uncle of mine who died due to too much alcohol. Everyday, I could not remember a single day that he was not intoxicated. My aunt (his wife) used to nag him about his vice, but to no avail. There were even moments when he would mix tap water into some denatured alcohol then gulp the solution thinking it was safe to drink. Little did he know that methyl alcohol is toxic to the body. Nonetheless, he savored it with gusto! His body eventually succumbed to liver and renal failure. Much like when my Lolo died, so many people attended his wake. Goodness gracious! I could not recall his name now!

Then several years after, My Lola Luming (Iluminada) finally joined Lolo Maximino in his grave. Lola Luming was so fond of me. She must have loved me so much. Dante, my brother, might have felt the same, too. Our Lola Luming used to joke around that Dan looked like our Lolo. Lola was so thin and frail before she left. But despite her age and frail body, she would wake up too early in the morning, go to her wood-fed kalan, pour some water into her favorite takuri, then concoct her best tasting coffee or chocolate drink. She would boil rice so early in the morning that before everybody would ever wake up, the rice would already be cold. But she loved doing it that way. All for her grandchildren. All for us. She was so skinny that I used to pinch her skinfolds then pull them away. Whoa! I could practically separate her thin, white skin from her few strands of muscles left on her bony structure. She flashes her best smiles each time that I could bring to her anything as pasalubong or even just a little amount. Many say she died not because of old age but because some magicians made a spell on her which she suffered from for so many years. And I miss her so much now...

Another Lola died when I was already working away from my home province. Lola Etrang (Petra) succumbed to heart failure and other sickness. Lola Etrang was a cousin to my Lola Luming. This grandma was the most endowed among my closest lolas. She was a pensioner receiving dollars every single month. Her husband, whom I never met because he died before I was born, used to work in the US. All I learned was that he died due to dog bite. He fell ill because of rabies. When my parents informed me of my Lola Etrang's demise, I immediately rushed back home. When I alighted from the bus, the house was well-lit. As I entered and took a peep at my Lola, I can't hold my tears back. They just rolled as I sobbed silently. This Lola of mine always gave us the best. Each time that we would go to Catayauan, my family would always stay in the house of this Lola. Tatang and Nanang would always see to it that we would go there. She would prepare the best food. She would bring out her treasured china and silver. And we feast.

My cousin, Joey, died of a vehicular accident. He was sideswiped while he was I guess seated along the banks of the national highway. They informed me of his demise but I could not manage to go home and pay him my last respects. But I prayed for his soul that he may find his place in heaven.

Joey's mother, my Auntie Filing, read Eustaquia, a sister of my Tatang, left this world also some years back. I was not even able to attend her wake anymore because of work. But like Joey, I enrolled her in perpetual masses for the dead. It was the best gift I could give her. His husband , Uncle Iniong (Irineo), died several years earlier. He was chopped to death and scattered his body parts along a creek in the rice fields of Catayauan. His recovered body parts showed burnt parts. We suspected the perpetrators of the crime broiled some of his chopped body parts and perhaps cannibalized them. Up to now, the criminals are unknown. A crime unresolved. Good thing, my cousins laid their anger to rest. It was a very gruesome death for my uncle who was also very fond of me. He farmed. He fished. And he would give us his best catch everytime that we were there. The family would call for us for a meal when there's some good fish they wanted to share. And I loved every bit of it.

Just almost a year after my ex-girlfriend gave birth to our second K, her Daddy Felix died. I knew it must have been a struggle for him gasping for the last breath. Daddy smoked like the days are numbered. Perhaps he also wanted to get rid of it but to no avail. Then he quit. It was an abrupt decision that he made. For a while, his body looked so healthy and strong. But the damage in his lungs was irreversible. With my almost ten years of knowing him, I felt he loved so much my ex-girlfriend. Whenever we would go home to Amulung, he saw to it that we had the best. He offered the best food. He gave us the best service. He looked up to us with all great respect and dignity. He loved us so much. He loved me. He was happy for our first K. He gave us always the best priorities which I haven't noticed on some of his in-laws. I felt so special to him. When he died, we all went home to pay our last respects and pray for his soul. He must have been very tired. He lived quite a life at 72. He raised 9 children. Followed by several apo. Whenever it was reunion time every Christmas and New Year, he was the happiest. But he only looked at us all from a distance. He enjoyed his solitude looking at everybody from afar. He would go to the backyard and chopped some firewoods. He cooked nice and delicious foods. He did not seek to be served. He served. He did not ask for special attention in his old age. He gave us the attention. He was simple and warm. Loving. Forgiving. Patient. Virtuous. Humble. A former grade school principal, he was able to stretch his understanding on everyone. He was a man of few words. I felt he had known me much. And I felt his love. And I loved him so much, too. Even after some years of his leaving us, I still remember him in the Masses I serve. It was my way of showing him how much he meant to me. How much I loved him. Life became a lot easier to carry through because of his inspiration. He showed me the way.

My long lost cousin, who disappeared for so many years and we thought he already died, all of a sudden came back to Catayauan. Perhaps for good. He did not show himself up for more than 20 years, I guess. During those first few years that he did not even communicate with any of us, we thought he was dead. There were even masses which we offered for him. Lo and behold, after more than 20 years, he was back. Thin, bloated tummy, Manong Romy (Romeo) was the same person I knew of before he disappeared. With the love of his life, like my uncle who died of alcohol, every single night he would gulp several bottles of Ginebra. But he was not the bully type. When intoxicated, he sings. He laughs. He jokes around. He blurts out some heartaches. Manong Romy stayed with us in Sanchez Mira when I was in high school. He was the first among many of my cousins that Tatang and Nanang gave education 'til college. All they could offer us back was household help. They would help us raise chickens or pigs. They would help my Tatang in his orchard of citrus as part of the plantations he was in-charge of inside the campus of a state university. Whatever we had, they had. Manong Romy was the eldest in the house. Of course, everything was Manong Romy. Please prepare me some milk. Please hand me my toy. Please, let me join you where you're going. Please do me a favor. Everything was Manong Romy. But he began his saga with alcohol when he was already gaining so many friends and barkada among his classmates. When he died, I was not able to go to his wake. To my regret. But I was able to see him and talk to him when I visited Catayauan one time. That was the first and the last. All he asked of me was a little amount for his love - Ginebra. I guess, Ginebra should pay him a tribute for being a loyal patron. When I learned that he was ill and it seemed like nobody was paying attention to his condition and he died because of illness, I was thinking he could have been alive up to this day had he been brought to the hospital. Rumors reached me that Manong Romy was telling he was weak and that he needed some medical attention. But his pleas were simply dismissed as mere symptoms of ordinary flu or because he lacked alcohol. Tsk, tsk, tsk. It was pitiful. His body succumbed to sickness which was not even identified anymore. My consolation is that he died back home. He went back home. Only to stay there for just a few more months.

Then it was the turn of my Lola Edding (Adriana Matilde). It devastated me. He raised me up for six years. Six fragile years of my life. I was a little boy still beginning to learn about living. My Lola Edding was not a well-to-do Lola. He was poor. Literally poor. And she died poorly. My heart wanted to burst when I learned of her demise. When I was in her wake, I couldn't help regretting why I wasn't able to find time to visit her often. And my tears would roll. But I was happy. She died while I am a Lay Minister of the Holy Communion. I was able to give her some last rites for the dead. Up to where we laid her down to rest. I loved Lola Edding so much. No one among my Lolas comes close. She gave her all. She sacrificed for us. She dedicated herself to us. She loved us. See my separate entry in this blog entitled Remembering Lola Edding...

There were several others who have left this world whose names I hardly could recall. But they left impacts on me. There was Lolo Duarding (remember General Eduardo Batalla, the one under siege in Mindanao by the notorious Rizal Alih?). Lolo Duarding was a relative of my Lola Edding, the mother of my Nanang. I was yet in college when the hostage drama caught the nation by surprise. I was glued to the radio, waiting for the latest development. I was enraged when I learned over the radio that he was finally gunned down by the rebels. Today, the name of General Batalla has been immortalized. Our former barangay of Gango in Camalaniugan was renamed to General Batalla, in his memory.

GTG to Church.

All Saints' Day

I went to an old municipal cemetery today. The Church is celebrating All Saints' Day. And being a Lay Minister myself, it was part of my duties to go to an assigned cemetery and bless the graves with holy water. On my way there, I saw throngs of people queuing to the cemetery.

In the Philippines, this holiday is a time to pay respects for departed loved ones. It is celebrated with both reverence and revelry. It would seem that all traffics lead to the cemeteries. And I remembered our beloved dead, especially my Lola Edding.

While the Mass was going on, I can't help but look around and notice the well-brushed graves. Some were expensively constructed with marble finish. Others with nice granite scape. But many were rough in hollow blocks. The epitaphs almost had a common format. The name, date born, and date died. Some lived very long lives. Others left early not even able to get to know the world. I also saw some who died in their early and late 20s. It must really be so painful for their loved ones.

I was imagining what's inside each grave. Many might just be bones. Some may just be beginning to disintegrate. Then questions rushed into my mind. Where could probably be their souls? Do they ever feel that this day is their special day? When will they ever 'come back' to life? Would it be true that when Christ comes back again, the bodies of those who have died will resurrect again? What happens to those who had been cremated?

Ahhh... by faith we know that Christ showed us a resurrection. And it is this same faith that gives us hope that someday we would live again.